Thursday, August 28, 2008

Heart Break

I experienced my first heart break for my son today. It was his birthday - a special day for a kid - we started the day off with a gift from Nana and Pap and promises of more gifts and a dinner out.

As the bus door opened this afternoon the bus driver asked if it was Grant's birthday - I said Yes and he proceeds to tell me that No One wished my son a "Happy Birthday" at school. Grant turned and looked at me with tears in his eyes and said not one person wished me a "Happy Birthday" Mom! Marah yells from behind - I DID GRANT!

As we walked back to the house I started to feel awful - knowing I did not send in a "Birthday Treat" for the class. Thinking I am the worse mom around - why did I not send one in?! The school has changed the guidelines for parties and I was told that they were cutting them out this year, but I still should have emailed the teacher...... By the time we got home I was in tears on the phone with my husband - explaining the awful day our son had and how I felt that failed him as a mom.

Grant looked so sad and down - that I sent him to play his new Wii game without starting homework and promising that we would have the best time tonight celebrating his birthday.

I went off to email the teacher asking if I could send in a treat for his birthday since I did not do it today. Then I called the school to see if that was even allowed - they said oh yes Mrs. Reynolds we do allow "special treats" with the following rules. So after I got all my rules for the treat -I had a plan in mind. (which is still up in the air - since the teacher emailed back stating they were told no special treats)

After I had a good-long cry - we went out and had a very nice dinner. As we were putting him to bed he tells me - "I am still upset about no one remembered my birthday. He said - even after we did the birthday chart - TWO DAYS ago - they still forgot!"

I know there are going to be many more heart breaks for my son - but the first one is the hardest. To watch your son feel hurt and sad - hurts you even more as a mom.

Dear Grant, this world will let you down and mommy might even let you down at times - but God is always going to be with you and carry you through your days - especially the bad ones. Keep your eyes on Jesus and grow with Him. I love you Grant and HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!

1 comment:

Katrina said...

Oh Rachel, I'm so sorry. Seeing our little guys have their hearts broken is so hard.

I'm really surprised that the teacher didn't have the kids sing happy birthday -- even if they can't bring in a treat, she still should have acknowledged and celebrated his birthday. Poor Grant! I hope today is a better day.